Sunday, October 12, 2014

My Ten Guidelines (And Suggestions) For Surviving Ebola: It's a ...


1. Ebola was first described in 1976. I think the first thing I remember on it came from Reader’s Digest in about 1977. Don’t ask me where I was when I read it, but it’s funny how it’s always the articles we read there that tend to stay with us. That kind of stuff has always fascinated me. The “Drama In Real Life” articles were the best, followed by those on the Soviet nuclear threat. I had weird reading habits.


2. Viruses have been a scourge throughout our history, and ebola is a nasty one. We know a lot about it, but sometimes nature offers us surprises. Ebola Zaire was always going to get here, because that’s what viruses do – and there will be other ones down the road. That said, we have lots of things now working to our advantage – and a few in the other direction. Everyone not operating from the same playbook would be top of that list. Like, if you have a list, and I have a list, let’s compare lists to make sure we have the same list. Things like that.


3. If you are in any way ever going to face the possibilty of standing up and re-assuring the public in a tense situation, please hone your public speaking abilities. Get a mirror and practice. Think of Morgan Freeman in that movie where he played the president. Do that. It sounds stupid, but it’s not. I know someone probably woke you up at Oh-My-God-30, and you haven’t slept since, but shake off the cobwebs and lead. And for pity’s sake, do not turn to your colleague while he’s taking a question and mutter “Step away!” under your breath near a live mic. That doesn’t help.


4. If you happen to run a TV station, please try to make sure your news anchors and reporters don’t look like they’re on the verge of peeing themselves. That is really not helpful. I know we’re all about to burst with wild speculation, but that’s what God made Facebook for. And no shouting on set coming back from commercial breaks, or jerking the camera around. Tea Leoni faced down a comet in Deep Impact, and you didn’t see her lose her cookies. Get it together people.


5. Reporting the address of where patient #2 “may have lived” is irresponsible journalism. Our first calling as broadcasters is to serve. You don’t do that by creating hysteria or fear. If someone else wants to run with it, let them. There are just some things we should rather not break.


6. Spare me the conspiracy and whack-job scientific theories, okay? Human beings don’t need secret meetings in dark hallways to mess things up, and royally so. The result is bad enough without the necessity of making up more. One Sunday morning in 1941 a radar operator saw a contact headed toward Oahu. His suprevisor thought it was a flock of birds. Three hours later the Pacific fleet was at the bottom of Pearl Harbor. Dumb happens a lot more than diabolical.


7. For God’s sake, let’s all do remember the people who provide the glue that holds this whole thing together? Health care workers and first responders risk their lives every day. So do police officers, law enforcement, and firefighers. Do they make mistakes? For heaven’s sake, yes. They are human. In some cases they probably need to be asked hard questions, and maybe even held accountable. But until I’m willing to walk in and handle someone else’s projectile vomit, I’m going to cut them a little slack. At the very least I’m going to hold the door open when I see someone in scrubs or a uniform.


8. We probably need each other more now than we ever have. All of a sudden it seems like the whole world is after us, while we peck on each other via Twitter. Common sense says our chances are better in sticking together, but never have we seemed further apart. Using phrases like “here we go!” or “this isn’t over yet” aren’t exactly helping lower everyone’s blood pressure. I saw one Facebook post Sunday morning that read, “If I were a healthcare worker, I’d stay home”. Think about that for a second. Think about what would happen if we all started thinking like that.


9. I know it’s a strange concept, but common sense would seem to be a good move here. It’s hard to even bring that up anymore without everything getting all political, but that’s not what I’m talking about. How about just starting by covering your mouth when you sneeze of cough? Washing hands? Easy stuff we hear about every day, and forget sometimes even though our mother told us. If nothing else that’ll help cut back on regular colds and flu, which we really don’t need more of right now. And, yeah, if you feel like blech…staying home isn’t a bad option.


10. Everybody worries. We’re not really built to, but what we see and what we’d hoped for don’t always line up. I know this isn’t the world I envisioned when kids a little older than me were singing peace songs in the 60’s, and it sure isn’t the one I thought I’d hand off to my children for the future. My beard has turned much whiter than I’d like. The only thing I can compare it to is seeing one of those giant flags businesses often choose to fly outside. Sometimes, if you look really close, you’ll see one that’s become really frayed. It’s in our better interest not to speed the process. It would be in our best interest to mend it.


I didn’t really intend to write ten ideas, but since so many seem to making it up as they go along I thought I’d join in. And one other thing:


Dear Newscaster – please omit the phrase “that changes the game, doesn’t it?” I know TV news makes us think Showtime! while the world thinks tragedy, but glee isn’t really called for.


JD




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