Saturday, May 19, 2012

Funny Religious Stories And Jokes | Religion

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Funny Religious Stories And Jokes | Religion
May 19th 2012, 07:17

Funny Religious Stories And Jokes

Many people remember the Western Movie starring John Wayne, TRUE GRIT. This article explores Writing with True Grit. Am I talking genre, language, characters? The truth is the gentlest, emotional story, even one with a religious theme, can be written with grit. Though many of you equate this to the suspense and horror genres. The word grit in my mind equals strength. That can mean character, language and plot. Genre is a moot point where this is concerned. Sometimes even the title can contain grit. How about THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY? In that famous Clint Eastwood movie the characters, the title and the plot all had the quality of grit. Even my own new book, which I hope to see released soon, is called PERDITION, meaning Eternal Hell. Gritty? You bet. Or how about my thriller, NIGHT FREEZE?

In THE PLIGHT OF MATTIE GORDON by Jeanne Marie Leach, the female character must face learning her son is a wanted outlaw. To save her son's soul, she is faced with throwing in her lot with the bounty hunter bent on catching her son to make sure he gets punished. This lady has true grit in big way.

But enough said about that. Let's first explore some characterization comparisons.

Strong female character: This woman perseveres despite every possible effort by persons or circumstances to reach her goal. She is not often given to tears, though sometimes, especially in private circumstances, she will let go with the water works. She wouldn't be human, if she didn't. (I especially dislike female characters who are veritable watering pots; they bore the liver out of me.) On the other hand, I hate a shrew. That's not strength; it's a weakness.

The strong female is intelligent, full of determination and is independent (sometimes to a fault). She is clever and resourceful, rarely leaning on anyone for help unless her situation is hopeless and life threatening. In religious works, she is allowed to rely on her Higher Power, but rarely other human beings. We humans are desperately flawed, you see.

This woman often toils to the point of exhaustion for whatever her cause. She possesses larger than life integrity and morality, at least by the end of the story. When faced with a fork in the road as to whether or not to do what is right as opposed to what her dark side urges her to do, she will always opt on the side of right.

A strong woman will be able to overcome the worst situations life has to offer, instead of wallowing in self-pity and becoming nauseously neurotic over it all, clinging to the negative instead of creating ways to turn her life around to the positive. There are endless examples of such things. Here are just a couple. In Sally Hickey's book, EMPTY SHOES, a ballet dancer ends up in a wheelchair. The female character must overcome this devastation and turn her life toward the positive. In my thriller, NIGHT FREEZE, my medical examiner must endure tragedy after tragedy and loss. What she does in the end to turn her life around might surprise you, but it makes logical sense. The point is the female character will have a choice of sinking or swimming in the end. And her decision must come from inner strength and revelation, not from another character telling her this is how it has to be.

A weak female character: She can't make a mature decision, she can't do this and she can't do that. She sits on her pity pot and agonizes over her lot in life or her losses. This woman often slides into hypochondria or severe depression that never goes away. Instead, she wallows in this depression until it becomes her comfort zone and there's no other place in her situation to be comfortable. Often she will turn to drugs (prescribed or not) or alcohol to ease her pain and thereby make matters worse for herself.

Often a weak female is so passive as to become seriously irksome to a reader. You want to scream at her, "Get a life, lady!" She allows herself to be abused; she is convinced there is no way out. Thus she becomes as sick and as cowardly as the abuser.

Strong male character: By this I don't mean some guy who looks like Hercules on steroids. Nor do I mean a guy who uses filthy profanity every other word. That just shows how stupid he is and lacking in vocabulary. A strong male character is many things, and a number of the same items mentioned in the female character apply. Remember, though, real life men operate from a different plane of thought and emotions than women, so subsequently there must be some major differences. Remember the MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS books.

This guy often exhibits leadership skills, is able to call a spade a spade, and is not afraid to dish out discipline or punishment when the situation requires it. This does not equate to abuse. Understand that completely. They are not the same things.

A strong character never makes inappropriate jokes that tend to put others down. This is neither funny nor heroic. He never abuses anyone, but neither does he mollycoddle them. Mostly these characters who consider themselves strong and who indulge in the aforementioned jokes, often hide a very weak character or terrible insecurity underneath all that muscle and bluster.

Consider this example. Could be our big strong guy is only five foot seven inches tall and suffers from a dread disease, but he will demonstrate his perseverance to overcome the odds, his integrity shines; his behavior toward others is not fraught with taking out his problems on everyone else. He does not self destruct via drugs and alcohol.

The ideal or larger than life male respects women and their abilities. He will be willing to work with them to solve a problem or reach a goal. He will take charge when the situation calls for it, and will give no quarter in that area. He acts like a man, not a pussycat. Consequently, his ego may be a bit larger than we ladies like, but through trial and error, he learns enough humility to appear heroic in the eyes of others.

Here again the character, whether male or female, often reaches a point where he/she must decide between right and wrong or desire versus what is right and moral.

A man who says things jokingly to others is often hurtful to the recipient. In other words, they're not funny. If your male character does this in the beginning of your story, you'd better make sure he shows a good deal of growth by the end of the story. Again, he must arrive at the knowledge his former behavior was akin to being a jerk, a bully or whatever, on his own. The decision to change and strengthen his character must come from inside him.

A strong man has lots of emotions and inner thoughts. He does not often exhibit them to his male friends or his female counterparts. There are exceptions, of course, but to be true to the male character he does not often indulge this practice.

Can a strong man cry? You bet he can, and it's unrealistic to think a man shouldn't if he's deeply hurt by a loss of someone he loves. He can't be a watering pot, either, and his tears are often, though not always, private. Tears for joy or pain come to most strong male characters rarely, but don't discount this when the situation calls for it. It is appropriate to their character.

Exercise (Use any name you choose.)

Sarah

Strengths:
Weaknesses:

John

Strengths:
Weaknesses:

List as many as you can in each category, just enough to make them real to the reader, not super-human. When done, make a list of those same strengths and weaknesses at the end of your story. Are they the same? They probably shouldn't be. Not entirely. What I mean is there should be a few add-on strengths by the end of the book. Caution. Make sure these characters have not become perfect by the end or they won't seem real. Some personality traits are there to stay with the character for life. The point is they can improve. Show their new strength through their actions and deeds. Don't tell us.

Make us all sigh with satisfaction by the time we read THE END.

Lee Emory will be teaching a workshop on this subject, WRITING WITH TRUE GRIT, at the 22nd annual Florida Christian Writers Conference February 28 - March 1, 2009.

About the Author

Lee Emory is an author of ten novels, numerous short stories and articles, who is also a professional editor for 40 years. She is the owner of/Senior Editor for Treble Heart Books Publishing. Lee teaches writing workshops and speaks at numerous writers' conferences. Visit Treble Heart Books or email leeemory@earthlink.net to learn more.

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