Saturday, September 20, 2014

'That all-natural shite'll kill you' | opinions expressed may be incorrect


I was getting ready to cook some chicken sausage (yes, chicken) when I thought about it again.


‘How long has that been open in my fridge?’


I reckoned 14 days. ‘Bah, it’s grand. It’s spiced.’


Then I had a funny feeling.


Hillbillies abhor: waste and wasterels. -them-that’s shiftless…I’d not have explained this word but spell/grammar check gave me the ‘WTF is that?’ thing. Surely you Flatlanders know wasterel, right? Is this another of my archaic-elsewhere terms? Whatever. The world is such a disappointment. . We’re also well respectful of the sight or signs.


-are the new readers gone yet?


I sniffed it. Smelt grand. Then as I went to grab some to pop on the heat, it slipped. That was that. You can only ignore instincts and warnings so much before the Good Folk give up. BobbyDigReed got sausage for supper. All of it!


Now I’m left with some week-old boiled cauliflower.


You go telling this about and people think you’re barmy. I am BUT my superstitious arse ain’t puking. Thanks!


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